January 1, 2022|In Faith|By Shovorne Adams

Many of us start life confident.

As a little girl, I spoke my mind, road my bike and my skateboard down steep hills, and wore whatever I liked, whether it was in fashion or not. My black Roger Rabbit skirt with a matching top and tiny sparkly silver stars all over was the absolute bomb, and so were my Batman jeans. If I could find a pair, I would don them now.

I was excited to have a McDonald’s Happy Meal every Friday, and I didn’t consider calories or weight. My go-to was the Cheeseburger Happy Meal with chocolate Milkshake.

If I was at a party or the school disco and wanted to dance, I did! It didn’t matter who was watching, and I didn’t need to wait for someone else to get on the dance floor first.

But, somewhere along the road of life, uncomfortable experiences chipped away at my acceptance of myself. I’m not sure if it was the boys’ joke about my tummy when I wore a crop top after school. CHIP. Maybe it was the comments people made about the shape of my ‘broad’ nose. CHIP. Or was it the hairdresser’s negative comments and laughter from her staff when blow-drying my ‘hard to manage’ afro hair. CHIP. Words like ‘she talks too much’ from a family member. Being cheated on as an adult.

Chip. Chip. Chip.

Chipping away, until one day, I realised it’d been years since I’d seen that confident girl. Where was she?

In some way, I think most of us have been shaped uncomfortably by large and small hurts.

But today, I thank God that He is a God that RESTORES. That He is a God that HEALS & MENDS, and He works it all out & shapes us into something BEAUTIFUL.

You see, the enemy wants us to cling to our hurts and let-downs so he can hold them against us and trap us into feeling like we were not enough. He will use those past criticisms and hurts to silence us because he knows that if we spend our lives clinging to the lies told to us, we’ll struggle to live in our true God-given identity. He wants us to live a journey of unforgiveness. Those lies are a barrier to who we are and our God-given destiny because somehow, they end up becoming the lies we tell ourselves. They end up being the curriculum and textbooks of our self-talk.

I don’t know what lies you have been spoken over you, long ago or even recently. Lies that hold you back from living in freedom, from really being you. But my prayer is that you’ll be released from those lies. In fact, it’s up to US to release those lies because we are the ones holding on to them. We are the ones taking them on as our identity. I pray God will shine a light into those areas and adorn you with the His truth. The truth.

Let me tell you. It’s time to ride down steep hills again, dress with physical & spiritual confidence in Christ and get our voices back. The only weight that I am ready to lose is the weight of other people’s opinions, knowing that God, himself, purposefully & intentionally formed me!

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We can’t always control what others say, but we can control our self-talk. We can’t control how others treat us, but we can create healthy boundaries and decide what we will and will not accept. We can choose who we let live in our minds rent-free.

I'm going to need you to big yourself up today! Big yourself up with the truth. I am:

Beautiful. Wonderful. Powerful. Beloved. Darling. Good. Whole. Complete. Purposed. Holy. Chosen. Called. Marvellous. Splendid. Royal. A masterpiece.

The TRUTH. The Bible says:

I praise you because I am fearfully & wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. – Psalm 139:14

You are altogether beautiful, my darling; there is no flaw in you. – Song of Solomon 4:7

You will be a crown of splendour in the LORD’s hand, a royal diadem in the hand of your God. – Isaiah 62:3

You made all the delicate inner parts of my body and knit me together in my mother’s womb. Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex – Psalm 139:13-16

For we are God’s masterpiece… – Ephesians 2:10

But you are a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, His own special people, that you may proclaim the praises of Him who called you out of darkness into His marvellous light; – 1 Peter 2:9

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Are you ready to live in that truth? I am. We can:

1) Meditate on God's word daily

Get rooted in God's love and His word. We will not thrive living on the past remarks of our enemies. We call on and live in hope and the words of Christ's good news. We breathe life into dead bones.

2) Silence our inner critic

Speak well over yourself, using God's word and daily affirmations. Remind yourself of what you love and like about yourself.

3) Choose forgiveness

This is the most challenging right. Seventy times seven and all of that! Letting resentment go. Phew! It's not east, but it's worth it.

4) Savour the good

Human beings have a propensity for dwelling on negative stimuli, which is why we should take extra care and effort to note the good, the wins, the kind words and compliments.

I’m so pleased that through God’s grace, I have been able to restore what the enemy tried to steal. I am seen, safe, heard. I am liberated and worthy of new beginnings. I am simultaneously right where I am supposed to be and on the path of personal growth. I am ready to run my race.

Are you ready to run yours?

With Heart & Hope,

Shovorne xx

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6 scriptures for when you've lost your confidence

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